


emphathetic sadism

by thehumannature



Category: BLACKPINK (Band), Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Dom/sub, F/M, Hardcore, Hurt/Comfort, Painful Sex, S&M, Smut, Subdrop, i hope neither lisa nor jiyong ever see this, no regrets from the author, philosophical conversations about sex, possibly triggering though i wouldn't classify this as even dubious consent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:34:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25111693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thehumannature/pseuds/thehumannature
Summary: Lisa sees Jiyong's eyes glitter with greediness when he looks at her. It's strange that it doesn't frighten or bother her at all. It used to, in the very beginning, when Lisa was still a shy 17 years-old trainee and he was G-fucking-Dragon. But she wouldn't trade the knowledgeable interactions they have now for the hesitance of that time.Jiyong doesn't want to think too much about what he would be doing now had he not found Lisa. He spent years looking for a girl like her; found many that wanted to please him even over their own self-preservation but none that truly enjoyed what he dishes out, not the way Lisa does.
Relationships: Lalisa Manoban | Lisa/Kwon Jiyong | G-Dragon
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	emphathetic sadism

**Author's Note:**

> mind the tags, 
> 
> enjoy!

Lisa shivers when he pulls out, body relaxing into the mattress at last, eyes closed in enjoyment. The languid feeling that falls over her each time is a high she can't help but chase, again and again. As she breathes in and out, the smell of sex is nearly overpowering, but so is the satisfaction from it.

And Jiyong immediately works on the bindings holding her hands behind her back. With a few quick, economic motions, Lisa's arms are free to relax with the rest of her. He takes a little longer on her legs as he tried out a special knot tonight, which is harder to undo.

She hears when his body hits the mattress beside her as he's done, feels the bed move. With languidness, she turns her face to look at him. He's laying on his back, eyes staring at the ceiling.

“Do you think it's possible to be an empathetic sadist?” The question is unsurprising, even in its' strangeness. Jiyong is a shy human, one who is prone to speaking only when he has something to say. Lisa has found that one of the times he's most likely to have something to say is right after sex.

“What do you mean?” She inquires softly. He indulges her, she indulges him.

“What we talked about, all these years ago.” He takes a deep breath, then turns his face to look at hers. His eyes are dark brown and luminous, their shape nothing short of a work of art. They stare into her with an intensity she has never found anywhere else.

“We've talked about many things.” Lisa points out, though she has an inkling she knows what he's referring to.

“I don't love people.” He states, emotionless. “I don't particularly want to be around them.” Jiyong keeps on staring at her face, his own expression empty. “I derive pleasure from their pain, having power over them makes me feel good when not much else does.” Lisa knows she should feel something… negative about such statements. But they _have_ talked about this before.

She just hums in agreement, encouraging him to keep going.

“You are not like me.” His stare is intent, impossible to ignore. Lisa allows it to wash over her, like a wave she knows won't drown her if she is quick enough to dive under it.

“I love many people.” Lisa answers, she gets the feeling he's expecting it. “I don't like being alone. I'm not good at it. Making others happy makes me happy.”

“You enjoy feeling pain.” It's not a question, he says it like a simple statement, a fact. Lisa knows he has seen enough concrete evidence of it.

She blinks at him, not saying anything, knowing he will get to the point when and if he feels like it. She feels too good at the moment to worry about much of anything, and if there's something Jiyong enjoys more than inflicting pain, it might be philosophical, strange conversations after sex.

None of it is new.

“Why?” He asks, still staring.

“I don't really know.” Lisa shrugs.

“If you had to guess.” She's amazed by how, sometimes, his questions don't sound like questions, for he delivers them in such a way that they are simply not a request anymore.

But Lisa sighs, he indulges her, she will indulge him.

“I'm happy when others are happy. That means I'm sad when they are sad. And when they are sad, or disappointed, or frustrated, or anything bad and it's because of me… I get so guilty. Once, when I was maybe 7, 8? my father bought a box of very expensive chocolates as a surprise for my mom. I was with him at the time, I saw where he hid it. I just wanted one. Of course, the whole box was gone in 10 minutes.”

Lisa stops speaking, lost in the memory.

“And?” Jiyong presses.

“And he found out. He wasn't even angry at me, but he got this look. Disappointed, maybe sad. It was horrible. I cried and cried and even when he told me it was okay, he could buy more chocolate, I just kept feeling horrible. I went into my room and cried non-stop for so long… then I got angry because I couldn't stop feeling bad.”

“What happened then?”

“I threw my lamp on the wall. My dad ran into my room and found me in full tantrum mode, out of control. I'm sure he didn't realize at the time, but when he held me still so I couldn't break anything else, it hurt. He's a big man, and I was tiny then. But I remember it was so quick after, I calmed down and stopped feeling so bad.”

Jiyong grunts and she knows he is thinking deeply about what she told him. A few seconds after, he rewards her patience by speaking.

“So you enjoy pain because it makes you feel less guilty.”

He isn't asking, but she answers regardless.

“No. I feel _pleasure_ from specific levels and types of pain. It's different. But I think guilt maybe has something to do with it, or with how it started.” Since he chose to have this conversation, she turns it on him. “Why do you think you enjoy causing pain?”

He needs no more than a moment to answer.

“Because it's the ultimate form of control. If you are able to, if you do purposefully cause others pain, then you are the one in power.”

“So, you are a control freak more than a sadist?” She asks, slightly teasing.

“I'm both. Though you won't see me deriving any pleasure from my neighbor’s dog dying.” He has a very soft smile on his lips as he speaks, Lisa smiles back.

“Because it had nothing to do with you, right? You didn't cause it.”

He nods.

“But even if I had.” He purses his lips, thinking. “It's more… physical, for me. I need to create it with my own hands. I need to feel and see the result on their skin. On yours.” He runs a finger softly down Lisa's exposed arm, where marks are already purpling from his strong grip earlier. “Hurting someone through something else is too indirect.”

A moment passes in silence, Lisa laying languid and thoroughly enjoying the way Jiyong continues to run the pads of his fingers over her skin. She enjoys pain, but she also enjoys pleasure.

“And what does all of that have to do with your first question?” Lisa asks out of a desire to keep him speaking. She does like the conversations they have, alone and naked in the dark. “What was it, about being an empathetic sadist?”

“Yes. I found myself thinking of that tonight.”

Lisa raises her eyebrows.

“Why?”

“I'm not a psychopath. I don't think I love, but I do… like a few people. I enjoy being around them in certain situations. I don't desire anyone's pain or misery, not above what I can dish out with my own hands. And even then, I don't wish for true harm. It's why I chose you, because I knew you would get something from this, as I do. It doesn't make me feel good to know I caused real, lasting harm.” He frowns his forehead in thought. “I've actually felt bad once or twice when that was the case. I can feel guilt.”

“You're a nice sadist.”

“I'm an empathetic one.”

“Sure. But why this insight tonight?”

He watches her intently, then his fingers slide up and along the side of Lisa's face to behind her ear, dragging back the hair that had fallen to cover her features. He then leans towards her, over her, until their bodies are touching and his face is right above her head, lips pressed to her ear.

She stays very still, suddenly tense but in the best way. He presses his lips against the shell of her ear, almost a kiss.

“I want to hold you down and fuck you until you can't walk without feeling it. I want to spank your ass, your thighs, your tits and your pussy until they are red and smarting, and you can't bear even the smallest touch. I want to squeeze and pinch and hit you until I know you will be half-blue tomorrow. I want to sink my teeth on your neck and stop just short of breaking the skin. I want to fuck you in the ass, hard and merciless.” One of his hands latches on her arm, holding firmly. “And I know you would let me do all of it.”

“Why don't you, then?” Lisa dares to ask.

“Because you wouldn't enjoy it. Not to the intensity I want to take it.” He lets out a breath, then licks at her ear, making her shiver. “You like enough pain to feel as if you have been punished, you've paid your due, you don't need to be guilty anymore. You don't enjoy being tortured.”

“I don't like being tortured, no.” She takes a breath. “But nothing that you said sounded like torture to me.”

He traps her earlobe between his teeth, sinking them in slowly, harder. Until Lisa's ear is burning and her core throbbing. He lets go.

“I want to ruin you, Lisa. I've always had these contradictory desires; to do no harm, but to dish out pain. But with you… I want you to enjoy everything we do. But I also want to ravage you, to take you to your limits and push beyond.”

She turns her head to stare into his eyes. Jiyong has told her many times that he doesn't love anyone, he isn't capable of it. Lisa is smart enough to see the warning in it; ' _don't fall for me_ ' he has told her, again and again. Lisa can proudly say she hasn't, miraculously, she, who loves every single meaningful person in her life, her members, all of her close friends, and most of her family down to that strange cousin she sees once a year who always makes her laugh with nonsensical jokes.

She loves people, generally and specifically. But Lisa has never fallen in love, and Jiyong won't be her first one when she does. And in the same way she loves others, she has been loved back. By many people, in many ways. She knows that glint in a person's eyes when they look at you and _love_ you. Has seen it many times.

Jiyong's eyes glitter only with greediness when he looks at her. It's strange that it doesn't frighten or bother her at all. It used to, in the very beginning, when Lisa was still a shy 17 years-old trainee and he was G-fucking-Dragon; she misses the adrenaline of it, in a way, though she wouldn't trade the well-oiled interactions they have now for the hesitant awkwardness of that time.

Lisa is not a sadist at all; and while she's a masochist, she isn't exclusively submissive. So, occasionally, when the desire hits her, she allows herself to surprise Jiyong with her impetus. Because, as intimidating as he may seem and as scary as he wants to be, Lisa is really not afraid of him at all.

She quickly turns her body to lay on her back and his strong grip on her arm immediately falters to allow her, avoiding what she knows could have been an injury – when push comes to shove, he has never and will never truly hurt her. She startles him when she puts both hands on his face, pulling him down to meet her halfway.

Lisa kisses his lips softly, slides her tongue over them smoothly, pulls his face closer and breathes into the kiss when he starts responding. His mouth is warm and tastes like toothpaste, Jiyong was always the best kisser she ever had. Not that she had many.

She's proud of how surprised he still looks when she finally pulls back. How, despite not being the one in control for those few moments, he seems to have enjoyed it just as well.

“I think I'm done for tonight. But I want you to do your worst, next time.” She pecks his lips again. Because she can.

He isn't done; she can feel him hard against her belly and she knows what comes next.

“I will do my worst next time.” He promises. “But I'm not done tonight.”

“But I'm so sore already, Jiyong-oppa.” Lisa plays the game, suddenly looking coy. “I don't think I can take anything in my pussy anymore.” It was a long time ago when she was too shy to say things as these to him.

He studies her, then smirks.

“I guess I can be merciful and just fuck your ass, instead.” He pulls back, settling on his knees. Lisa trembles, looking at him. She hates and loves anal sex… it always hurts, no matter how well-prepared and lubed up she is. And it's right on that fine line between what hurts too much to feel good, and what hurts just enough to feel the best.

Each time is agony, with every thrust she doesn't know if it's too much or exactly enough. It's one of Jiyong's favorite things, he relishes in hearing her scream, causing her torment.

Lisa could stop him now. Tell him 'no' and that would be it. They have no safeword because neither is necessarily into rape kink – except on the few occasions where Jiyong asked to try it out. If she says 'no' it means 'no' and he will stop.

But she doesn't.

The lube is within easy reach, on the side table. Jiyong takes it and with quick, practiced motions he spreads a good amount on his hard, bobbing member. Lisa knows she is in for it when he makes no motion to spread lube on her as well, and as he grabs her hips to turn her on all-fours, she shivers in anticipation.

She makes use of her free hands to grab the metal headboard, her free legs to spread them enough for good support. When he slaps her ass hard enough to make her yelp, she takes the hint and arches her back, exposing herself to him.

“Good girl.” He tells her, and she relaxes immediately. Jiyong knows Lisa so well.

It starts burning the very second he pushes in. The glide is eased enough by the lube, but not to a comfortable extent. And Lisa's stubborn muscles clench tight, failing to push his invasion out but succeeding and giving her the most satisfying pain of forced stretching.

Jiyong groans behind her, delighting in her tightness and even more on her pained moans.

He holds her left hip with one hand, then grabs a handful of her hair, which is long for now, and pulls back until her scalp is burning, her neck uncomfortably pulled, her back as arched as she can make it.

She screams when he starts thrusting, the burn intense, her position uncomfortable. Her knees go weak and fail her, leaving her even more open and vulnerable under him as she fully lays her body on the bed.

He is merciless. While she doesn't tell him 'no', doesn't ask for a reprieve, he will give none. And he can last so long when he wants to, dragging out her torment.

About five minutes in, Lisa starts crying. She's glad to have held out this long. Everywhere Jiyong is touching her body it feels like agony. His hand in bruising her hip, still pulling her hair like a leash, his cock ravishing her. Her weird, traitorous pussy is throbbing, leaking in pleasure. She knows when he decides to touch her there, it will be seconds before she's coming.

Still, she cries into the bedding, as loudly as she wants to because she knows he loves hearing it.

“Jiyong-oppa.” She sobs. “Please, please.”

“Please what, Lisa?” He groans, sinking in her deep.

“Ple-please touch me.” She squirms, her scalp is finally going numb, but the burn in her ass has never been worse.

“I am touching you.” He has the gall to answer, his voice amused.

“Please touch my pussy.” Lisa amends, groaning in pain and pleasure.

“That's better.” He praises, and she shivers, happy to have pleased him. As she knew it would happen, the slightest touch of his big hand between her legs has her trembling in pleasure. He knows exactly how close she's to an orgasm and makes sure to keep his touch too light and teasing for her to reach it.

“Oppa, please, let me come.” Lisa begs.

“Only when I'm done.” He counters, emphasizing it with a particularly hard thrust that has Lisa's insides recoiling.

“It hurts so much. Please, please, I need to come, oppa.” She sobs, knowing her face is gross and puffy from crying, but not caring.

“What you need doesn't matter, my little Lali.” She likes it when he calls her that. It sounds… intimate.

He makes his point clear by continuing to fuck her, hard and steady, occasionally slowing down to pinch her ass cheeks or slap them. Lisa enjoys and hates her torment; too intense to be pure pleasure, painful enough to be the most pleasure.

She cries and begs some more, knowing he will only give her reprieve when – if – he wants to. At last, he lets go of her hair to instead slide a big hand across her neck, holding her arched under him and effectively cutting her breathing.

Whenever he does that, Lisa knows he will want her to come, soon.

Jiyong is careful about not squeezing her neck too tight so there won't be marks and her breathing is just hindered, not stopped. He also relaxes his hand completely at intervals, allowing her to breathe freely because he knows how easy it is to unintentionally cause real harm when doing breath play, and he can't see her face in this position.

Lisa instinctively brings up a hand to grip at his forearm when he tightens his fingers against her windpipe again. The controlled strength in his muscles makes her feel small, vulnerable and breakable. He could suffocate her to death while fucking her ass and there would be absolutely nothing she could do about it; he's stronger and bigger and in control.

When he relaxes his hand again so she can breath in a loud, difficult breath, she is ready for this to be over. Her pussy is throbbing, desperately clenching on nothing, Lisa is sure she has made a new wet spot on the bed. Her scalp hurts, her hip is nearly numb from his squeezing and she wants to scream with his every thrust inside her, the agony is so intense.

“Jiyong, I need it. Please, make me come.” She tells him, no formalities.

Lisa knows he gets it, because he slides his hand to between her legs again, where he gives her swollen nub much-needed attention. A few expert flicks and she's gone, she would be screaming her way through the earth-shattering orgasm he is giving her if he hadn't chosen this moment to cut off her air supply again.

Her lungs are burning by the time he lets her breathe, and the much-needed air that comes in seems to shock her body into a longer, even more intense orgasm. With air in her lungs, she can scream herself raw.

It's long seconds later that it stops. Lisa is faintly aware that she's shivering, body still lightly convulsing, but completely limp on the bed. Jiyong hasn't come yet.

It burns. She moans, overwhelmed.

“Please, come.” She tells him. “Jiyong, come, I-I can't take much more.”

He bends over her and lands a kiss to her shoulder. Then he grabs her body, turning it so she is lying on her back. Lisa is aware she must look like a wreck, and that is the exact reason he turned her around.

He wants to see his good work.

Jiyong's eyes slide over her, taking her all in. Then, he thrusts inside her ass again, and Lisa's body twitches. She closes her eyes, enjoying the pain, hating it.

When she opens them, she finds him watching her.

“You can tell me to stop.” He says.

“I-I want you to come.” She tries breathing out and in slowly, to calm down her overwhelmed body.

“I don't have to. You don't need to endure it until I come. Just tell me to stop.” He tells her, thrusting hard inside her. Lisa sees starts behind her eyelids when she closes her eyes.

“Please, come.” Her voice is thin, tears start leaking from her eyes again.

“Tell me to stop.” He continues his assault, unfazed. But Lisa knows him, she knows he's enjoying this, knows he is close by the sweat on his temple, the way he is grinding his teeth, how his grip on her hips is unfaltering.

“It hurts so much.” Lisa sobs, and it does. There's still no small amount of pleasure from it, but now the agony is overpowering.

“Say the word.” Jiyong insists.

Lisa takes one, two deep breaths. Her hands go down to hold onto his forearms, unsure if she wants to push him away. He keeps going and she lets him, tears on her eyes. One, two, three minutes go by.

When she thinks she absolutely can't take anymore, it's too much, the pleasure/pain scale too askew, Jiyong breaks.

He has been watching her the whole time. He must see the agony in her eyes, now truthful in a way it wasn't before. He leans his body over hers, heavy and hard, and thrusts in so deep her toes curl.

“Fuck, Lisa.” He tells her, pushes himself in hard and painful three, four times until he finishes emptying inside her.

He breathes against her neck and doesn't pull out, not until he goes soft and Lisa's exhausted body does it for him. Then he kisses her face softly, her cheeks, her forehead, the side of her mouth. Lisa has her eyes closed, too tired, too overwhelmed.

She hears when he gets up, walks around the room. He goes into the bathroom, then comes out. He opens a drawer. She hears water running.

Lisa isn't surprised when he picks her up in his arms.

“Are you awake?” He asks, but she knows he is aware she is. Still, she opens her eyes and looks at him.

Lisa isn't sure what she's feeling. Everything is fuzzy and while her body still hurts, she's completely relaxed. It's...like she's detached from herself, in a way. It's good, but scary. She burrows herself under his chin.

This has happened before, but it has been a while. A sub-drop, he explained to her once. By the careful manner he handles her now, lowing her body slowly into the warm bath water, then coming in as well so that he can hold her comfortably against him, she knows he's aware of what is going on.

They are not very into after-care, neither of them. But when Lisa gets like this, it's important. She needs it, to go back to herself. If he denied her that, he would be causing real harm.

And in a corner of Jiyong's brain he mostly ignores, he enjoys it as well. It's like a victory, a selfish one. He dominated her so strongly, overpowered her so surely, he now needs to help her get herself back together. He holds her smaller, soft body against his and kisses her temple. He grabs a washcloth and soap and uses them to slowly, carefully clean her.

When he is almost done, he feels Lisa move to turn her face to look at his.

“That was… intense.” She says, and Jiyong knows she is out of the woods.

He kisses her again anyways, something unnamed swelling on his chest. He figures he's grateful to her, for allowing him what she does, for getting her own measure of satisfaction from it. He doesn't want to think too much about what he would be doing now had he not found Lisa. He spent years looking for a girl like her; found many that wanted to please him even over their own self-preservation but none that truly enjoyed what he dishes out, not the way Lisa does.

“Are you okay?” He asks her.

She nods.

“I don't know if I will be able to walk tomorrow. But I'm fine.” She turns around and sits with her front against his. They are both too exhausted for anything, but the position is nice. Jiyong never really enjoyed human contact, not even from his mother, who had to hold him in place to land a kiss on his cheek when he was small.

But he enjoys contact with Lisa. She's warm, soft, and – in the only way that matters – his. He doesn't and will never love her; he knows she has been smart and hasn't fallen for him either. Still, it's nice to be close to her. He supposes her body has given him so much pleasure by now that his brain started to recognize it as 'good', 'nice', 'pleasurable to touch' even when they aren't planning on a sexual encounter.

“It was almost too, too much, today.” Lisa tells him, though she doesn't seem concerned about that at all. “I was about to tell you to stop before you came.”

“Why didn't you?” He sits back more fully against the tub, eyes sliding down to see her nipples perk when she straightens her back and they leave the water. She has the prettiest breasts; small and round, with cute light brown nipples.

“I was going to, but then you came. Before… I guess it wasn't too, too much yet.” She tells him. “Why did you push so hard today?”

“I want you to realize what we were talking about before, Lisa.” He has a hand on her back, which he moves down over the curve of her behind and up again, mindlessly. “I don't necessarily want to push you too far. But 'too far' for me and for you are different things. I wanted you to realize that.”

She narrows her eyes then, a stubborn expression falling over her face.

“But you didn't, though. I didn't say stop, it didn't get to be too-too much.” She pouts, looking as adorable as… well, as herself. Jiyong doesn't tend to find many things adorable, but Lisa he certainly does. The way other people would describe something as 'as cute as a puppy', he could describe as 'as cute as Lisa'.

“I suppose you're right.” He tells her, mouth stretching into something dangerously close to a real, honest smile.

Satisfied she has won this round, Lisa leans forward to lay her head against his chest. Instinct drives Jiyong to wrap his arms around her as she does, and bend his head to kiss the top of her hair.

He doesn't love Lisa, but she _is_ precious to him.

“I usually am.” She has the gall to say.

He chuckles.

**Author's Note:**

> I am aware I'm trash. I have no idea why I've been feeling the urge to sexually torture Lisa in a story, but this is the fruit of that. Please let me know what you think, and if you have ideas for more debauched things to do to her, let me know.
> 
> Btw, I love Lisa and would never, ever, ever even breathe close to her if I thought she would be bothered by it. May I be blessed that she never sees what I write. G-dragon is smoking hot, unproblematic and close to Blackpink, so I thought 'why not?' and wrote him with her.


End file.
